Sunday, May 12, 2013

Why You Should Stop Reading about Happiness

   “People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.” 

― Abraham Lincoln 

Le Feu Follet
 I've read tons of articles on happiness, not for the reason to be happy or happier, but because of my curiosity to know what they are writing and what is the difference between them. Most of the sites I visited are top-visited and which are enough famous among certain groups. What I found in them is that you should change your perspective of happiness, just be aware of the situation (of bad situation for sure) and don't get depressed and blah blah blah. What I dislike in these articles is that they are too commonplace and they are everywhere presenting the same so-called "truth".

     "Please smile, life is beautiful" or "just breathe deeply" could hardly work for someone who is busy at work all the time and getting home at night reading that article with a big tiredness and thinking about his shitty life and job.

    Let me tell you my story.
It was 2 weeks ago when I got informed of a girl (who was in my friends list in facebook) who made a suicide at her 13. She was cute, smart for her age, but as her friends told me, depressed and tired of her schoolmates. I remember myself being very unhappy and quite lazy to do something and was blaming all the educational system and her parents for that. I tried to take deep breath, to smile, to laugh, to be happy or just to be aware of the situation and understand that life goes on. But it didn't work. I was exhausted for 3 days and I could hardly smile at people. Then gradually everything became normal as before. I understood that happiness cannot be taken out of somewhere and it's not really inside us. Happiness is nowhere, but it is everywhere. Happiness is just happiness. We humans are not content with the happy moments of our lives and that's why we start to seek for eternal happiness. We look for the best job offers, more money, best places to visit, best shit to eat, best person to fuck. In the end we go nowhere and we are more deluded with the idea of happiness that was created around us. We think that we should be happy all the time and that a strong person should never have a bad moments, angry face or unhappy moments.

So what should we do now?

     It's the time we have to understand that enlightenment or happiness are not what we used to think about. If there was an answer or a sentence that could describe them, it would be wrong. We have to learn to live and be humorous in these moments. That's what living the present is. It's not smiling to the moment. That hungry child from India will not smile back to your stupid smile while he/she is hungry. All they need is food, not your smile or meditation you did yesterday. Happiness is not about showing the fake face all the time. Happiness comes when you live your life. Yes, live it! Don't just eat, drink or sleep. Live it as you would in your next life. Then you'll be happy like never before. And remember, you don't need to be in the best mood all the time. You are just a human like others.

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” 

― Dalai Lama XIV

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